LCN 103: Embarrassing Confessions (or How Not to Become a Prolific Creator)

On Saturday, I drove with my husband (affectionately known on the podcast as Miracle Man, or MM for short) up to Sonoma to the Sonoma International Film Festival, because a friend of ours, who is a professional screenwriter and director, wrote and directed a film that was showing in the festival.

His name is Joel Souza, the film is called Veracruz, and he crowdfunded the money to produce the film a few years ago in an Indiegogo campaign, which we had supported, and this was our first opportunity to see the final product, so of course we couldn’t miss it.

We stayed overnight with a friend of mine from the calligraphy world, then we had drove home on Sunday and promptly took a nap after lunch.

That afternoon, after waking up for our nap, I played in the Creative Sandbox and made some art. Then I photographed it, and shared this picture on Instagram.

Then I shared this photo, along with a spontaneous post (below) in my Creative Sandbox Community, that touched on something that I’ve long thought about, and have long wanted to write about on the blog, but I don’t think I’ve ever managed to do so in any meaningful way, so I thought I’d talk about it today on the podcast.

Because this is something that I struggled with for a long time.

It led to a lot of pain and suffering, and I know I’m not alone.

So let’s shine a little light on it!

Especially the part that I’m embarrassed to share.

Here’s what I posted in the Creative Sandbox Community (listen to the podcast for a longer riff):

We spent the night a couple of hours away, drove home and promptly took a nap after lunch–so tired after a restless night. So my Creative Sandbox time was late in the afternoon today, Sunday.

I spent a half hour doodling on a tiny canvas, then photographed it and shared it in this grid.

The photography is as much a part of the play and fun, I think, as the art-making–I really enjoy it! And the sharing to Instagram.

This has become part of my (almost) daily practice, something that pleases me very much. 🙂

The particulars change–what, exactly, I’m creating–but the FACT that I create something, and share it, just about every day, is kind of a miracle to me.

I have become the prolific artist that I longed to be 20 years ago!

All through the power of imperfectionism and small, daily acts.

All through the power of the Creative Sandbox Way and the Guideposts and my Golden Formula.

20 years ago I had none of those tools. I had none of the *vocabulary*, even. I didn’t understand why I was so stuck.

I thought it was simply that I wasn’t good enough.

Or that I didn’t have time.

Or both.

All I knew was that I was miserable, and I wanted to be creating, but I couldn’t figure out how.

My friends who *were* creating prolifically, I actually kind of hated–it was easier to wish they would stop, than to look at ME and try to change ME.

It was easier to blame external forces (I.e., all the things keeping me from having the TIME) than to look at my FEAR and SELF DOUBT and PERFECTIONISM.

Wow. What numbers we play on ourselves…

I’m so grateful I finally climbed my way out of that pit. Took me long enough!

That’s why I’m so passionate about what I’m doing now. About spreading the word, so others don’t have to stay stuck down there.

I’ve got a ladder, and I’m so so happy to share it!

And right now, in April 2017 I am making teeny tiny abstract canvas doodle paintings, which will be for sale at my open studio in May.

How things have changed from 20 years ago.

Something Cool

Winsor & Newton watercolor markers

Yes, just what they sound like — watercolor, in marker form! I bought the 12-marker set (these are Amazon affiliate links, fyi), and I’m having a ton of fun with them. I find I like them best two different ways:

1. Lay down just a little color with the pen, then spread the color out with a waterbrush — the handle holds water, so you never need to dip it; you just squeeze the handle to get more water into the bristles (I use this set of three Derwent waterbrushes, with three different brush tips)
2. Put some color down on a scratch sheet, which then acts as a “palette.” I then pick up the color from that palette with my waterbrush.

Enjoy!

Thanks for Listening!

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Now go get creating!

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