So how’m I doing in my quest to re-invent my life, follow my evolving Blisses and create the life I really, really want?
We’ve known for some time that I have a thing for juggling lots of balls.
Just as Nature abhors a vacuum, I seem to abhor a vacuum in my day planner.
There is an inherent problem in this. It’s called Melissa-Gets-Worn-Out.
A snapshot from Melissa’s history of taking on a helluva lot
Several years ago, straddling the time of my divorce, I found myself on three (count ’em, three) boards of directors at the same time. In addition, I was workshop chairperson for one of my two calligraphy guilds – in charge of organizing all workshops and evening lectures (a job that was later split into two), and I was founder and chair of the Shalom Committee at my synagogue.
Oh, and I designed and edited the monthly synagogue newsletter as well.
While I was being subsidized by spousal support, this was doable (if a bit crazy-making). When the spousal support came to an end, though, it was simply impossible. Unless I wanted to live on the streets, or move back in with my parents (um, love you guys, but no, thanks), something had to give.
That was when I learned to say no
Once I got started, I was kind of like a two-year old. “No” became one of my favorite words. I got very good (or let’s just say, a helluva lot better) at setting limits on my time and energy.
If it didn’t make me money, or make me happy, even if I felt like I should do it, I (mostly) didn’t.
History repeats itself
This time around, I’m not spending gobs of time volunteering. I look forward to getting back to it (though maybe not quite so excessively), but for now, building my Internet Empire and getting myself out of debt are my top priorities.
I’ve gotten very good at saying no – at least to sitting on committees and boards of directors! (I still inscribe Tanakhs – Bibles – for the bar/bat mitzvah kids at my synagogue… and I said yes to a request that I lead Shabbat services the other night…)
My biggest challenge these days is saying no to things I really want to say yes to, because there’s a larger yes that takes priority.
And, of course, balancing all those balls so I don’t wear myself out.
Learning to outsource what I don’t need to do myself is part of this, as I discussed last week.
Figuring out what balls I can safely drop is another.
The self-care ball
One ball I’ve dropped many times in my life is the self-care ball. It’s so easy to work late into the night. When my obsessive-compulsiveness kicks in, it’s so easy to focus so intently on my deadlines – external and self-imposed – that stuff like sleep, “chill” time, exercise time, and time with the special people in my life gets neglected.
This is not good!
Tomorrow’s creativity lesson (or today’s, by the time you’re reading this) on 365 Days of Genius is all about this, as it happens: I’d Pick More Daisies.
How appropriate.
This week all of the work I’ve been putting in for the past few months really caught up with me. I felt utterly run down. Exhausted. Burned out.
I could tell that something needed to happen, and fast, or I was going to get really sick.
I had to stop pushing, and start resting.
I had to let go.
I had to take naps.
I didn’t get the new interview posted on the Thriving Artists Project. I didn’t get the 12 guest blog posts and interviews that are scheduled to run soon done. I didn’t get my bookkeeping caught up.
I learned to be just a little more forgiving of myself
And perhaps just a little more realistic.
This is a lesson that I’m going to get a lot of practice with in the coming months, as my new businesses continue apace, and my old business revs up with the onset of wedding season.
I guess it must be time for me to learn this lesson.
Here we go…
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Meanwhile… a couple of announcements
Which I was going to announce earlier in the week, but literally did not have time.
This Thursday I’ll be performing in a vocal competition at Oak City Bar & Grill, where I’ll be doing my best to entertain in my Uke Diva persona. The winner of this local version of American Idol gets a paid gig at the restaurant, which would be cool, but honestly, I can’t think about the competition aspect too much, ’cause it just makes me profoundly uncomfortable to be judged for my creativity in a competitive manner.
Definitely a topic for a blog post, but as noted above, I’m so busy I barely have time to breathe, let alone write any additional blog posts. So we’ll just leave it at that for now.
If you’re in the San Francisco Bay Area on Thursday, come on by and cheer me on! The applause-o-meter will determine who progresses through the three sets to win the night.
Thursday, January 20, 7:0pm
Oak City Bar & Grill
1029 El Camino Real
Menlo Park, CA 94025-4305
(650) 321-6882
Thriving Artists Project news
Yes, I know, you’re anxiously awaiting the doors to open again to the Thriving Artists Project. The course just gets cooler and cooler – tomorrow is the first members-only webinar!
Never fear, I’m relaunching very soon indeed (be sure to sign up on the TAP advance notice list if you haven’t already, to get, um, advance notice, plus discount pricing. And oh, yeah, a 30-day free sneak peek inside!).
And while you’re waiting… You asked for it, and you got it (or will very soon):
Group Coaching “Mastermind” Telephone Classes
Get personal attention to help you bust through whatever blocks are in your way, but in a supportive group setting. (And for less $ than One-on-One consulting.) I’m revving up to offer 4-week Group Coaching Mastermind Classes via telephone to a small, select group. Interested? Just fill out the form below, confirm your address, and I’ll let you know when a class opens up. (First priority – and special pricing – goes to Thriving Artists Project members. Just sayin’…)
