A package arrived in the mail on Monday. I’d ordered it from Amazon, and I’d been waiting with baited breath for it to arrive.
Nothing hugely exotic or romantic; I’d ordered a simple brayer.
Two brayers, in fact: hard rubber and soft, the hard one with the black rubber being identical to the one I sold for pennies on the dollar (ahem) at a yard sale a couple of months back.
Oops…
Clutterbusting, it seems, can go a bit too far.
I divested myself of the (quite possibly never-used) brayer, a quart-sized bag full of erasers (for carving stamps with), and my (granted, very limited) collection of rubber stamps, including some letters I’d carved myself.
At the time, I couldn’t imagine I’d have a need for these things, and my goal was the rid myself of the weight of all the stuff I had but wasn’t using.
It seemed only logical to sell the brayer and stamp stuff. In fact, I was proud of myself for letting go.
Then I signed up for an online class with Kelly Rae Roberts, and guess what was listed on the supply list.
Yep, a brayer.
At first I figured I’d wait and watch the videos, and see whether I really, really needed one. Surely I could get by without, right?
Well, yeah, I could have, but it just looked way too much fun. A brayer seemed like a textural tool I’d want to use, like, forever onward.
So I bit the bullet, shelled out fifteen or twenty bucks, and bought myself two new brayers, which have been getting a lot of loving since then.
This is one of my favorite pieces that shows off some brayering (the white layers):
The Moral of the Story: SHED
It would be easy to conclude that the moral of this story is to hang on to everything, because you never know when you might use it, and in fact, that was pretty much my life philosophy for a long, long time.
Which is why I now have clutter issues…
Clearly holding on to everything, just in case, is not the optimal solution, so what is?
Well, for that I have to thank Jeannie. She recommended a book she was reading, SHED Your Stuff, Change Your Life, by Julie Morgenstern, so I placed another order with good, old Amazon.
I’m about a third of the way into the book, and I have decided that Morgenstern is a genius. She has pinpointed one of the biggest problems when it comes to clutterbusting: once you’re ready to start letting go (which really requires relinquishing an old identity… which is why it’s so godforsakenly hard), it is all too easy to be so indiscriminate and ruthless about clearing stuff out that you get rid of stuff you regret letting go of later.
Morgenstern’s solution? To come up with a theme, or vision, for the future you’re walking into. “A broad goal or feeling,” she writes, “an overarching simple expression of the adventure you’d like to be on.”
In other words, if your life were a book, what would the title of this chapter be?
The 2 1/2 years when I went on 57 first dates, for example, might have been titled The Quest to Find My Life Partner.
When the relationship that started at the end of those 2 1/2 years broke up, it started a new chapter, which might have been titled The Quest to Find My Life.
My current chapter title might be Creative Expansion.
The Importance of a Theme
Why is it important to have a theme for the chapter you’re starting (or in the middle of) now? Well, it gives you a sense of clarity about what you want to clear out, and why, and what you want to keep, and why.
As Morgenstern writes, “your theme will be your beacon, focus, and filter, paving the way….”
Had I read SHED Your Stuff, Change Your Life and come up with my theme of Creative Expansion before I first ran the Great ClutterBust, back in April, perhaps I would have held onto that brayer (and stamping supplies), and not be kicking myself now for spending money on something I’d just sold for pennies at a yard sale…
Ah, well. Correct forward, as they say, and I will soon have a great opportunity to do just that, because I’m running another Great ClutterBust in October!
In the last Great ClutterBust I totally overhauled my studio, but I have a lot more clutter still to bust — physical clutter, time clutter, habit clutter — all of which Morgenstern tackles in SHED Your Stuff, Change Your Life, so I’m excited to go into the next Great ClutterBust (which starts on October 1st!) with a much clearer vision, now that I have a theme.
Here’s some of what I accomplished with the first Great ClutterBust:
Before:
After:
Before:
After:
Reading SHED Your Stuff, Change Your Life is the ideal preparatory read as I get ready to do another deep dive into clutterbusting, starting October 1st. If you’ve got clutter to clear out, of any variety, you may want to check out Morgenstern’s book yourself, and I hope you’ll join me for the Great ClutterBust! Sign up on my mailing list to get notified when I open up registration.
Onward, ho!
PS — Pssst! Know someone who might benefit from seeing this today? Pass it on!
Ah Melissa…..no need to kick yourself over a re-discovery…and just think, someone else is discovering something great with the brayer that was let go. No telling what you may have started.
What a great perspective, Mark! I love that, and was thinking the same thing: “Well, I know who bought the brayer and other goodies, and I know where she’s taking them, and I know they’re going to GOOD use by people who will so appreciate them.” So it was, in fact, my way of giving back to the Universe.
And there is really never a good reason to kick oneself or beat oneself up. I know this. (That doesn’t stop me from sometimes doing it, though. Self-compassion is a practice. 🙂 )
You’re supporting the economy by purchasing the additional brayers! 🙂 So, so weird…I looked high and low the other day for a brayer (yes! also a brayer) that I thought I had and for the life of me cannot find. I definitely have to de-clutter – because my problem is I don’t think I sold it at a yard sale – I just can’t FIND it amongst the clutter!! Perhaps I will join you-all on Oct 1.
Haha! Yes, good point, Sally! I can feel good about supporting the economy, AND giving someone else the opportunity to play with those tools. 🙂
Hope you do join in on October 1. 🙂
I can so relate to your post, Melissa! Inevitably, when I finally get rid of something I need it…..sigh. But I love your idea and plan to read the book you recommended. I really intend to clutter bust the clothes in my closet. I think this will give me more psychological space as well as physical space! Hope I can join you!
Jenni, YES, clearing closets (and other areas of too-much-stuff and stagnation) is AMAZING for opening up psychological space as well as physical! This was one of the benefits that was talked about over and over in the last Great ClutterBust.
“I feel like I can THINK again!” was a common sentiment. 🙂
Melissa, $20 is a small price to pay for the great achievements of the Great Clutter Bust! A very small price (ahem). Didn’t you wind up getting into Huffington Post or some breakthrough like that shortly after? It seemed connected to me. Not to mention, the photos speak for themselves. Gosh, I hope I’m able to join in for October. Just a great thing to do for everyone involved–and if it’s the same structure, count me in.
You know, Carol, that is a GREAT perspective! I don’t remember when the HuffPo invitation came, but I can say that the Great ClutterBust dramatically improved my quality of life. I used to walk into my studio and feel instantly oppressed. Now I walk in and smile (though there are still clumps of clutter, which I intend to deal with during the Great ClutterBust!)
YES, it will be the same structure! I hope you join in. 🙂
I have gotten rid of many things that I had to re-buy. Sigh.
But most of the time, I think this process is important and a minor inconvenience in my life. The cost of carrying around the extra weight and burden of too many belongings is high. I assume that whatever I re-buy is probably cheaper than keeping too many unnecessary things. Sometimes this translates to actual dollars and cents–I have moved many times in the last few years and every extra box can mean extra moving costs or higher rental costs to afford a place to store it all.
But even if I don’t pay actual money to keep too many things, there is a burden on my psyche.
I like to look at my belongings and feel an “alive” feeling from them. I like to know I use them, enjoy them and that they have a place in my life. If they are energetically active, they are worth keeping. If something feels heavy and dead, it’s time to let it go. What is alive in my life comes and goes but I don’t like to hold onto what has passed.
Your old brayers probably felt dead at the time you let them go. Now you have new ones that feel alive. I’d say it is worth the price!
I LOVE this attitude, Julia. You are so right: the cost of carrying around the extra weight of too many belongs is very high, and at the time when I was clearing out this spring, the brayer and erasers did feel heavy and dead. My new ones now feel alive. The $20 or whatever is so insignificant in the scheme of things. 🙂