In my mission to get people not just creating, but going after bigger creative dreams, I’ve come to realize that the #1 thing standing in most people’s way is their mindset. My upcoming program for women, Time to Glow, is designed to foster profound mindset shifts, precisely so that women can dream bigger, and (just as importantly!) really go after those big dreams.
Let me tell you a story about how a shift in my own mindset led to my becoming a teacher, to my teaching all over the country, and more recently, to the foundation for the realization of a long-held “impossible dream.”
Cue the harp music
Signalling going backwards in time, of course…
Back in ’97, when the internet and my career as an artist/calligrapher were both in their infancy, before Yahoo groups, Google groups, blogs, Facebook and online forums, I joined an email listserv for calligraphers, Cyberscribes.
Although I didn’t realize it at the time, my marriage was just 2 years from disintegrating into divorce. My husband’s father was in poor health, and my husband moved out of our house and in with him in order to be his caregiver. I was lonely inside this crumbling relationship, and I found the connection I craved — with people all over the globe — in the Cyberscribes emails.
I didn’t identify myself as “a teacher” AT ALL back then, but teaching is in my blood (I kinda can’t help myself), and I leaped at the chance to offer helpful info whenever anyone posted a question I had any knowledge or experience with. People noticed.
I also must have sensed that my marriage was on shaky ground, because when a fellow Cyberscribe named Sheryl posted a real-life cautionary tale that she was divorcing after 20+ years and now had only her part-time income from a freelance calligraphy and teaching business to support her, her situation really resonated with me.
What if that happened to me, I wondered? (Not really believing it ever would…)
Sheryl and I started chatting offline, and soon became fast friends. A few months later, right before Sheryl was scheduled to drive from Maryland to New York to teach a workshop, I flew across the country to meet her.
This was back when 3D relationships that started online were still pretty new, and I think my parents and husband were a little anxious that Sheryl might turn out to be an axe murderer, but in fact, she was delightful and lovely, and our friendship was very close for years afterwards. But that fall day back in the late 90s I met her at the train station in Washington, DC, stayed in her house, and the next day we had several hours to talk in her car, on the drive to Long Island where her workshop was to be held.
“You should teach,” Sheryl announced, mid-way through our long drive.
“Yes, I’d love to, someday,” I said. It was a dream of mine, though a far-off one. I certainly wasn’t ready yet.
“No, you should be teaching now,” she countered.
“Now? What could I teach?” Didn’t she know I wasn’t ready?
“I can think of at least 8 things you could teach, right off the top of my head,” said Sheryl. And she went on to list them: numerous different lettering styles, book arts, a survey of calligraphy tools, collage…
Huh. Turns out I knew a lot of stuff… Still, the idea felt rather overwhelming. I wasn’t “a teacher,” remember?
Later, on day 2 of her workshop, Sheryl gave me an amazing gift. She took a detour from the topic at hand and invited me to do a demonstration of my signature version of Neuland, a calligraphic hand I developed based on an early 20th Century typeface of the same name.
It was maybe 20 or 30 minutes, max — not much — but it was enough to give me the guts to go home and organize my first full-day workshop, where I taught Neuland to an enthusiastic group of 10 scribes (and sweated like a pig from nerves the whole time!)
As an itinerant teacher who traveled the country giving workshops, Sheryl was a wonderful role model. She made me see that yes, this was something I could do too! She was also an amazing and generous mentor, giving me that demo opportunity, and connecting me with the workshop chair of a guild in New Jersey who soon thereafter booked me for a weekend workshop on the strength of Sheryl’s recommendation and my Cyberscribes reputation alone. (I find it amusing that the first workshop I was ever hired for was on the other side of the country! Getting hired for local gigs proved much harder, as everyone seems more interested in the “expert from out of town” than the “local yokel.” Also, note the power of being helpful. People notice. And remember.)
For awhile there, back in the late 90s, itinerant teaching was a big part of my tiny business. I taught in a multitude of cities in New York and New Jersey, Connecticut, Chicago, Houston, Dallas, San Antonio, Austin, and all over California.
But in order to get there, I had to make a major mindset shift. I had to stop thinking of myself as “not a teacher” and start thinking of myself as someone who could totally learn to teach well, and continue improving as a teacher.
Did I feel ready at the start? No. But the truth is, you’re usually ready long before you think you are. Taking actual steps toward that big dream almost always feels scary, because you haven’t done it before. If you had, it wouldn’t be in your “I want to do that someday” list anymore, would it?
Back in the present…
There’s a more recent chapter to my teacher story. Although I’ve been hired to teach all over the US, I’ve always had a dream of teaching in other parts of the world. A week-long workshop overseas… Imagine! But it seemed a rather impossible dream. The logistics alone always felt overwhelming, beyond me. So the idea remained in my “maybe someday, when I’m ready,” category.
Once you’ve experienced one mindset shift, though, it creates space for others. And when fellow artist & creativity coach Kelly Hevel signed up on my email list last fall and I discovered she lived in Istanbul (where I’ve always wanted to visit), and that she also had a dream of teaching creativity workshops around the world, we kicked into gear. We both shifted from thinking of ourselves as “someone who dreams” to “someone who does.”
Yep, we’re offering our very first in what we hope will be an ongoing series of creative immersion vacations and retreats in inspiring locations around the world. Starting in Istanbul — September 30-October 7! Click the banner to read all about it. (and save $100 if you put a deposit down by May 31).
Meanwhile, I’ve channeled that “someone who does” thinking into creating my latest program, Time to Glow, the culmination of what I’ve learned over my lifetime about living a creative life.
This is the course I’ve been wanting to offer for years — combining tools to battle sexism, self-doubt, fear, procrastination, perfectionism and more — but until now I didn’t know quite what, exactly, it would look like and how to make it happen. The mindset shifts I’ve experienced thanks to my blogging journey, lots of inner-work, and lots of wonderful teachers, books and online courses, have helped me identify my most precious gifts and strengths, and how I can best share those.
Do I know everything? Lord, no! But I’ve shifted my mindset to be able to see that what I do know is enough to share with others, and to be of tremendous value. My goal is to help you shift your own mindset, to see the amazing value you bring to the table when you use your creativity, to get you from dreaming to doing.
You may not feel you’re ready, but I know you actually are.
I’d be honored to have you join me on the journey.
How have you shifted your mindset to get from dreaming to doing? Where are you still stuck?
PS — Pssst! Know someone who might benefit from seeing this today? Pass it on!
Hey! Hello! Announcement!
Come hang out with me at 5pm PT tomorrow, Wednesday, May 2nd at my free monthly Hangout! I’ll be jamming with fellow Passion Pluralite (she calls us Multipotentialites) Emilie Wapnick, of Puttylike.com, and we’ll open up the conversation to everyone there, so bring your thoughts and questions!
We’ll hang out together in a special online “room” where you can participate via text chat, audio and/or video, or just observe if you like. (Don’t worry, nobody will see you unless you specifically fire up your webcam!)
Read more about it and sign up here. (Did I mention it’s free? Really! It is!)
