Blog - Melissa Dinwiddie | Create the Impossible™ | Innovation Keynote Speaker & Consultant

May 8, 2010

Big internal changes require big external changes

When I got divorced I cut my hair. Not just a trim—I went from long, plain (though fabulously red!) locks, to a short, sassy new hairstyle.

My reasoning: big life changes require big hair changes.

After all, I was integrating a new identity as a single woman. I needed a new “face” to show the world.

Now, over a decade later, I’m in creative free-fall, an exhilarating (if sometimes exasperating) state, and I’m in the process of integrating a new identity once again.

This time, though, instead of divorce, it’s the metaphorical opposite: instead of splitting up a relationship, I’m bringing together my many relationships with my many selves.

There’s Melissa the artist and calligrapher. There’s Melissa the singer/songwriter. There’s Melissa the writer/blogger. There’s Melissa the teacher/coach. (Notice how even my individual identities are multiples!)

For much too long I’ve separated out these various selves (and their sub-identities and offshoots). It’s time to consolidate and integrate.

The new title:
Melissa Dinwiddie, Renaissance Woman Multi-Passionate Creative Artrepreneur

I tried on Renaissance Woman for awhile, and it was a great exercise. But it wasn’t quite right.

There were a few problems:

Not everyone is familiar with the term “Renaissance Man (or Woman),” especially people from other countries! I guess it’s an English-speaking thing.
There’s the unintended implication that “Renaissance” in the title means involvement in historical re-enactments. Um, no. Ren Faires are cool (and I sure wanted a hoop skirt when I was 9!), just not what I’m about.

I knew I needed a new title, and when I listened to a Question the Rules interview with Marie Forleo I knew I’d found part of it. Marie calls herself a “multi-passionate entrepreneur,” and like me, she’s got a lot of different stuff going on, her fingers in a lot of pies. (Check out her site — she’s a great inspiration!)

And contrary to the conventional wisdom that niche-ing oneself is essential for success, she makes her diversity work for her business and her brand!

ROCK ON! I want me some of that!

However, “entrepreneur” doesn’t adequately describe me. It’s too “business-y,” and excludes the creative/art side of who I am and what I do. So I added “creative,” and changed “entrepreneur” to “artrepreneur.”

So: Multi-Passionate Creative Artrepreneur. (Thanks Marie!)

The website

In addition to a title, I knew I needed a new website. When I started LACL, my immediate goal was to get my feet wet in the world of blogging. I didn’t have a clear vision of how it would fit in with my overall business model or brand, just that I wanted to start writing and exploring.

At the moment, I’ve got a whole bunch of disparate websites, each showing different sides of myself and what I offer.

Ketubahworks = my wedding and lifecycle art

MDDesignworks = my calligraphy and design (and not updated in years!)

MelissaSings = my music

The Dating Queen = my blog about dating

Living A Creative Life = my blog about following my evolving Blisses and creating the life I really, really want.

(And there’s also the unfinished Wedding Artworks = my ill-fated site that I started when I thought it would be a brilliant idea to try and capture the larger wedding market. Suffice it to say, it was an expensive mistake.)

Now I realize I need a platform that consolidates all of those facets together.

I need a site that represents the whole me.

Here’s a mind map of what that looks like today:

So now my big project goal is to build a new site that ties it all together. A lot of work, but I’m excited about it! Once I have it up, I’ll be able to send people to ONE site, rather than several.

So now I’ve got a brand new site that ties is all together! A lot of work, and still ongoing, but I’m excited about it! Now I can actually send people to ONE site, rather than several.

This is exciting! I’ve got that telltale buzzing inside that’s a sure sign I’m on the path the Universe wants me on right now. (Know what I’m talking about? If so, you’re definitely a kindred spirit.)

Big internal changes require big external changes.

Watch this space!

May 7, 2010

Weekly Review #6: New Site, New Epiphanies

Inspired by Havi (because she’s brilliant), and because looking back is a great way to figure out the best way to move forward, I’ve started a ritual of reviewing the week that was: what went well, where it got hard, what to take away, and next steps.

How was your week? Chime in if you like!

—

But first…

BIG NEWS!

If you’ve been here before, you can see the big news with your own eyes: I’m in the middle of a major site overhaul. Just like remodeling a house, it doesn’t happen overnight, and there’s a lot of stuff out of place, and dust on the ground for awhile.

Thankfully only virtually in this case, but still, your patience is much appreciated.

I’m still getting the hang of Thesis (which is a brilliant theme, btw — thank you Chris Pearson!), and haven’t quite figured out how to get what’s in my head up on my screen (yeah, yeah, I know some of the images rotating around are placeholder, generic photos; they’ll change soon).

Baby steps.

Part of this big overhaul is a shift to a new URL: melissadinwiddie.com. Going to livingacreativelife.com will still land you here, but technically, the domain is melissadinwiddie.com.

Why the change? Honestly, I’ve kinda agonized over this one. It’s my identity crisis acting up again.

The thing is, part of what I’m trying to do is to consolidate all of my various identities into one. A single brand, if you will. And the only name that is truly representative of everything I do and am is Melissa Dinwiddie. Period.

So, while this blog is still Living A Creative Life, and the cool stuff I have planned in the works will be branded as Living A Creative Life cool stuff, it all resides at melissadinwiddie.com.

It really shouldn’t affect my imaginary audience too much, but if you find a link that doesn’t go where it’s supposed to, be an angel and let me know, will you? Thanks!

And expect the look of this place to evolve over time.

Okay, that’s out of the way! I’ll have more to say about my new “brand,” including a brand new title, in tomorrow’s post, so watch for it that! (Hint, hint.)

(And since identity is a big part of my psychic space, be prepared for future ramblings on the topic.)

Now, on to my weekly review…

What went well

Great self-care

I’ve had 2 weeks in a row of 3 yoga classes/week! And my shoulder’s feeling pretty okay. Plus I went on several glorious, hour-long (brisk!) walks in the Baylands.

For two weeks, 6 days out of 7 I’ve had at least a half hour (and usually an hour) of exercise.

I’ve been taking this commitment seriously in an attempt to keep migraines at bay. And of course it helps in so many other ways too. Yay me!

Working on re-finding my voice

I bought three stretched canvases! Not being an oils or acrylics person, I’ve never worked on stretched canvas before, and this is a new, scary and exciting thing. And the best part: I actually WORKED ON ONE the SAME DAY.

Epiphany

I realized this week that a great part of my stuckness and overwhelm is simply from putting energy in a direction that’s really not what I want to be doing. I couldn’t figure out why I wasn’t jumping on it! Then (click!) I remembered back 17 years ago, when I couldn’t get myself to fill out my PhD applications.

Because I really didn’t want to get a PhD.

Doh!

The difference here is that back then I had absolutely no idea what to do instead. Whereas now, although I’m not entirely clear on the path to getting there, I actually know what I really want! So I pretty much just confirmed internally that yes, I’m going full steam after Plan A, torpedoes be damned!

The challenge now is in finding/re-finding my voice, but more on that in some other post…

New inspirations and resources

I listened to several Question the Rules [affiliate link] interviews, and discovered Marie Forleo, a multi-passionate entrepreneur who is living proof that it’s possible to succeed brilliantly by doing all the things you’re passionate about. Without niche-ing yourself into a box.

I also met some great inspirational models in the Empire Building Kit [affiliate link] case studies, and the Art + Money Unconventional Guide [affiliate link].

I also read Module One of the Launch Coach’s Creating Products that Sell class. Excellent! (Check out the Launch Coach Library of free downloads here.)

(Watch for full reviews of each of these products in future posts.)

All in all, I’m feeling very pleased with my online course purchases.

A gig!

Oh, how great it is to get a microphone in my hand! And getting paid for it is even better.

What was hard

Physical stuff

Grrr… I’m in some extreme physical discomfort, and my doctor doesn’t have a good answer. Grrr…

My knee is not super-happy from all the yoga. Grrr…

Monster migraine on Wednesday forced me to cancel my evening plans. Grrr…

Emotional stuff

Serious post-gig let-down. 🙁

Takeaways

It’s good to notice that I am making progress. Baby step by baby step. And the deeper I connect with the fullness of my multi-faceted self, the more grounded and hopeful I feel. My fears — about money, and so much else — just don’t grip as hard when I’m embracing and reveling in my true self in all its glory.

Next steps

I’m in major learning and consolidating mode right now, but I do have some concrete goals to work on: mainly getting this site in a state closer to completion, and making headway with my various e-books and courses.

I’ve also got a bunch of ideas brewing away, so it’s time to pull out my journal and go wild with mind mapping.

And after that: more reviews! The courses I’m doing are too good not to share.

Have a great weekend everyone.

May 5, 2010

Fear, trust and baby steps (the perfect headstand not required)

Last Tuesday Giselle made me promise to come to her Jivamukti yoga class this week. With the new month comes a new focus-of-the-month (love that about Jivamukti!) and she knew this month’s focus would be good for me.

She didn’t spill the beans about what the focus would be, but it wasn’t a big surprise when I sat in virasana today (propped on block and blanket, since my knees really don’t like this posture), eyes closed, and listened to her opening talk.

Which was all about fear.

Ah, yes, now I understand why she wanted me to be there.

Fear of falling (and busting my sorry ass)

Last week I confessed after class to my great fear of inversions in the middle of the room, away from the safety of the wall. I burst into tears when I almost fell out of a headstand last week.

Guess what we’ll be focusing on this month? That’s right: inversions. Forearm balance, handstand, headstand. Any posture that brings up fear.

Giselle demonstrated how easy it is to fall out of a forearm balance and land on your feet. How easy it is to fall and not get hurt.

And still, I played chicken.

Oh, I kicked my legs up, I did the “assignments,” but even though I know I can do forearm balance and handstand against a wall, even though I’ve actually achieved balance for moments at a time without touching the wall (just moments, but still!), I couldn’t quite get myself to kick up hard enough to shoot for that same balance in the middle of the room.

I knew I was chickening out, and I still chickened out.

So what’s going on here?

Lack of trust

Well, there’s the excuse that I’ve got an old shoulder injury that’s acting up (which is true), and I don’t want to aggravate it (also true). But that’s just an excuse.

The reality is that yes, I’m afraid. I’m afraid I’ll really hurt myself.

Because underneath it all, I don’t quite trust myself.

I don’t trust that I’ll get all the way up and not fall backwards, and (even more important) I don’t trust that I’ll be able to pull off that falling-out-in-a-safe-way trick.

Taking myself where I am

I could have beat myself up about my chicken-ness, but instead I chose just to notice what was going on inside and let it be.

I know that the way to conquer my fear of inversions is to do them. I know that the way to learn to trust myself that I’ll be able to fall out in a safe way is to try falling out. I know this.

And I also know that right now, I’m not quite ready.

And you know what? That’s actually okay.

So I’ll coddle myself for awhile. And maybe I’ll ask Giselle to spot me, or maybe I’ll “cheat” and keep using the wall until I build up a bit more confidence. And maybe by the end of this month I’ll make some progress.

Or maybe not. Maybe I’ll do inversions against the wall for the rest of my life. (And would that be such a bad thing?)

The truth is, although I think being able to do handstands and forearm balance in the middle of the room would be smokin’ cool, it honestly doesn’t matter to me whether I achieve that or not.

What I do care about, though, is growth, and busting past limits. Although I’d love to be Smokin’ Cool Yoga Girl, yoga is just a petri dish for change in my larger world.

I want to push past my limits in yoga, because I have a very strong suspicion that it will help me push past my limits in the rest of my life.

My commitment: baby steps

So my goal is not to achieve a perfectly balanced handstand or forearm balance away from the wall this month. I don’t actually care about that.

But I do care about making progress. I do care about moving forward and learning to trust myself. I do care about proving to myself that I can do things that feel hard. So my goal is to try to go just a bit further than I’ve gone in the past.

Maybe that means kicking all the way up into a handstand in the middle of the room, just so I can try falling out of it. Or maybe that means doing a handstand at the wall (even if Giselle chastises me). Just one tiny bit beyond my current comfort zone is all it takes to make forward progress.

Baby steps.

May 4, 2010

2-Minute Tip: The Tickler File

It’s Tuesday! Time for a 2-Minute Tip.

Which isn’t actually two minutes, but it sounds better that way, don’t you think?

Which is, of course, why 2-Minute Tips are also posted on Tuesdays. (Though not necessarily every Tuesday. Just sayin’.)

—

Hey, you Creative, you! (Anal-retentive types, you can skip this one; it’s for the rest of us.)

Are you drowning in piles of paper? Do you frequently tear your hair out, because you put a bill or other important document in a pile to be dealt with later, and now you can’t find it?

Here’s a quick tip that might change your life, from David Allen’s book Getting Things Done.

Enjoy!

(And a gold star to anyone who finds the mistake in this video. Hint: space/time continuum.)

May 3, 2010

The First Month of Building My Empire: Empire Building Kit Review

So in my goal to follow my evolving Bliss(es) and create the life I really, really want, I’ve spent a lot of time and energy looking for models and inspiration. Who’s already out there living their dreams, and how did they get there?

It’s a bit overwhelming, really, because once you start looking, a metric ton of experts and phenoms start crawling out of the woodwork, usually hawking their own magic must-buy-it-now-before-the-price-quadruples key to “multiple streams of income,” happiness and “total fulfillment.”

(Seriously. That’s verbatim from [at least] one of these so-called experts.)

Whom to trust? Who’s got the goods that will really help me, in my unique situation, and who’s just trying to squeeze me for my hard-earned cash? (Okay, I know they all want my cash, but some really do offer value in exchange for it.)

After some months of intensive research, I’ve hand-picked a number of teachers to cast my lot with (in addition to the countless others whose free blog posts and newsletters I read), so consider this post the start of an ongoing review.

Teacher #1: Chris Guillebeau

My first inspiration in this journey was Chris Guillebeau of The Art of Nonconformity. His free downloads, A Brief Guide to World Domination and 279 Days to Overnight Success are top notch in content, prose, and design (which, as a smart, literate artist-type, I really appreciate!), and I resonate with his generosity of spirit, and his un-sales-pitchy approach to marketing.

Most of all, Chris is doing exactly what I want to do: living the life he wants, doing what he loves, and making a living at it.

Not freelancing, not exchanging his time for money. No, Chris has figured out the convergence between what he loves to do, and what other people are willing to pay money for.

Clever monkey.

I’m one of the people willing to pay for products that Chris puts out. Why? Because he earned my trust with his free downloads, his blog posts, and the personality and values that come across in his work.

Plus, of course, the very fact that he’s doing it speaks volumes for his credibility.

First off, I dove right in and signed up for Chris’s $100 Business Forum, which he co-facilitates with Pam Slim of Escape from Cubicle Nation. However, this 28-day online group of 150 fledgling entrepreneurs doesn’t start until May 10, so I have no reviews of it yet. Watch for those later in the month.

Though I was sorely tempted by several of Chris’s Unconventional Guides, in my first trip through the Unconventional Guides store I reined in my covetousness and limited my purchase to this one $100 “product.” I kept a tight grip on my credit card. I would be strong. I could wait until after the $100 Business Forum before deciding on any future purchases.

Ha.

Famous last words.

The Empire Building Kit

Wouldn’t you know it, savvy Chris is continually in the process of creating cool, new products, and when he announced his Empire-Building Kit, a 365-day course for building your “empire” in one year by doing one thing every day, I knew I’d been well and thoroughly hooked.

It didn’t help my pocketbook that Chris is very good at building pre-launch excitement: he teased his mailing list for weeks with details about the upcoming launch, tied it with an epic train trip across the country on (believe it or not) The Empire Builder, then opened it up at special pricing for 24 hours only. (Are you taking notes on this launch? I was!)

Naturally, I couldn’t resist. And not only that, but I confess I sprang for the top-of-the-line “Hail Caesar” version, which cost (if memory serves) almost twice the price of the the middle, “Alexander the Great” version, and about four times more than I was consciously budgeting.* Yikes!

As if that weren’t enough, I’d forgotten that the Unconventional Guides shopping cart has a sneaky tendency to offer cross-sells — special combo-offer packages at special prices if you BUY NOW.

Damn!

Yes, I didn’t call Chris a clever monkey for nothing. I have much to learn from you, Master.

I’ll admit I couldn’t resist the package deal of two guides I’d been wanting, Art + Money and Working for Yourself, especially when combined with a special report, Marketing School, by none other than Naomi Dunford of Itty Biz.

(In case you haven’t heard of Naomi, she’s pretty much a god in the world of marketing and making a living as an online small business.)

Final damage: $449 for the EBK (gasp!) less 10% “secret discount,” plus $97 combo offer = $501.10.

Ouch!

That represents a big chunk of change to me right now, when money’s tight and business much slower than I’d like.

However, the goal is that these purchases will help my pocketbook, and my happiness, in the long run.

So what’s the verdict?

Well, I’m only 27 days into the EBK, so I can’t give a complete review, but so far I can say it’s pretty damn awesome.

What’s in it?

6 lengthy video interviews with folks who’ve built successful (but achievable-seeming) “lifestyle businesses,” discussing their route to success, mistakes along the way, etc.
Transcripts of same.
18 PDF case studies of other “lifestyle business” owners, with a variety of businesses ranging from a dog trainer to a guy who hosts murder mystery parties.
9 short videos on very useful online business tips, from finding prospects, to crossells and upsells, “tools I use,” and more.
a 43-step product launch checklist
an interview with The Launch Coach, Dave Navarro (another teacher whose courses I’ll be reviewing in a future post)

(Note: I believe some of these items are only included in the “Hail Caesar” version, but am not sure which ones, since the EBK sales page was taken down after the initial 24-hour launch.)

Upshot: You get detailed financial information of 15+ other emperors. From Chris: “We asked everyone how much money they make and how they make it. This touches on a taboo subject (talking about money specifically) that everyone is interested in but few people address directly.”

That’s not all, though. One of the cool elements of the EBK, and one of the reasons I decided to invest in it, is that every day I get an EBK email from Chris. That’s 365 days of emails.

I’ll admit that at first I was a tad disappointed that the emails don’t always have a specific tip or actual step to do toward building my empire; sometimes it’s just a reminder of the message in yesterday’s email, or a wrap-up of the ideas covered in the previous week.

That said, I think the most important thing about the daily email concept is simply that it keeps me focused on my goals. In a way it doesn’t actually matter what’s in the email.

Don’t get me wrong — many of the emails are awesome; several have had exactly the concept or idea that I needed right then to move me forward in my thinking. Chris has clearly put a lot of thought into them, and I find many of them very worthwhile.

However, perhaps the greater value is just in the daily reminder, the daily validation that yes, I am going after this, and I have someone walking next to me on the journey for the entire year.

In addition, precisely because the EBK is set up as a year-long course, I’m not finding myself succumbing to the usual overwhelm that enormous projects like this normally stir up. I don’t feel anxious to watch every single video and read every single transcript and case study RIGHT NOW, because I know they’ll be “assigned” one by one over the course of the next several months.

Whew. What a frickin’ relief!

Seriously, this is huge. In the past couple of months I have amassed an e-library of countless e-books, special reports, mp3s and videos, and it’s doubtful whether I’ll ever manage to get through all of them.

But the EBK? I know I’ll get through it, because I’m on a year-long journey, and I’ll be assigned each of these modules eventually.

Deadlines are magical things.

Rating so far: 4 7/8 stars out of 5

(And not 5 stars only because the marketing led me to expect an actual step to do in each and every email.)

It’s early days yet, so this rating could change, but suffice it to say I highly recommend the EBK to anyone who has a dream of creating a sustainable business and “empire” of their own.

The EBK will be re-launched on May 18 for 24 hours only. I’m not sure when and if it will be on the shelves again after that, so if you’re serious about living your creative life and need some inspiration, motivation, and a partner on the journey, mark your calendar to check it out.

Full disclosure: if you use one of the links on my site to click through and buy any of Chris’s Unconventional Guide products, I will earn affiliate income. But I believe in his products and stand by them. If you buy them and don’t like them, feel free to complain to me.

And then ask for your money back from Chris, because he offers a 100% satisfaction guarantee.

But I seriously doubt you’ll feel the need to do that.

Wrap up

This post got long, so I’ll hold off on my review of Art + Money for another time. I haven’t finished it anyway. But just 13 pages in, it’s already changed my outlook in a dramatic, and positive way. And that alone is worth $39.

If you’ve gotten any of Chris’s other guides, I’d love to hear what you think.

Now it’s back to empire-building.

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*Why did I spring for the Caesar version? Mostly because it’s the only version that contains behind-the-scenes views of Chris’s entire business model, something I really, really wanted to see.

The new title: Melissa Dinwiddie, Renaissance Woman Multi-Passionate Creative Artrepreneur