yoga Archives - Melissa Dinwiddie | Create the Impossible™ | Innovation Keynote Speaker & Consultant

March 14, 2011

Weekly Review #49: How A Well-Lived Life is Like a Yoga Posture

So how’m I doing in my quest to re-invent my life, follow my evolving Blisses and create the life I really, really want?

My poor sweetie must be confounded by me sometimes.

One week I’m chirping about how much I love my life. The next I’m lamenting that I have no idea what the **** I’m doing.

Hell, I confound myself!

Welcome to the Wonderful World of Being a Multi-Passionate INFJ Enneagram 4.

A week or so ago, when I noticed I was spinning my wheels again, I took Peter Shallard’s Next-Step Challenge by answering some questions on a brief questionnaire. I received back from him an impressively substantial email, the heart of which said:

What I think you need to do Melissa, is start to find your “great why”.

Bingo!

With so many projects going on at all time, so many disparate balls in the air, I tend to get caught up in my to-do list and feel as if I’m flailing around, expending a lot of energy but not getting very far.

I lose track of my “great why,” and my sensitive system can tell. My Blisses seem to be bounding off toward the horizon, while I’m stuck in my to-do-list rut.

This does not for a happy camper make.

Getting back to my Great Why

So let’s take a deep breath, shall we? Pause, take stock and re-assess.

What do I enjoy most about what I’m doing now?

Making art!

Since committing to my 15 Minutes-a-Day challenge on February 1, I’ve been making time every single day to make art, and honestly, my biggest complaint is just that I wish I could spend all day at it.

True, I’m not always satisfied or happy with what emerges from my time in the Creative Sandbox, but that comes with the territory of being an artist. Despite my frustrations, the fact is I’m vibrating with new ideas, and after years of longing to be prolific, I’m actually starting to accumulate a body of work!

Last night I drove up to Santa Rosa to see a one-woman show of my friend and fellow calligrapher Sherrie Lovler’s work. For the first time in years the idea of an art show feels within the realm of possibility, and that feels great.

Artist interviews!

I confess, I started the Thriving Artists Project to inspire myself, and in that it has been an astounding success.

I love, love, love conducting the interviews, and I love, love, love listening back to them when I edit them for posting on the TAP site.

The feedback I get from my members is wonderfully validating that I’m inspiring more than just myself, too, and that feels great.

Consultations!

A number of people have taken me up on the free 1/2 hour consulting offer, and what a treat that has been! I’ve been enjoying it so much, and learning so much about my fans and how I can help them, that I’ve decided to keep doing them for the time being.

I’m not going to give away free sessions forever, so if you want one, I do recommend scheduling sooner rather than later. Just go to https://tungle.me/melissadinwiddie and give me at least 3 (more is even better) possible time slots to choose from. I’ll get back to you with a confirmed time.

What’s the catch?

Well, I will ask you to write me a testimonial if you get something useful out of the session. But whether you write one or not is totally up to you.

Seriously, that’s it. I’d love to work with you, so sign up now and let’s get started!

Performing!

I don’t have a ton of gigs on the calendar at the moment, but I am performing this month (this Friday, in fact, in a benefit in celebration of International Women’s Month for Be a Dear and Donate a Brassiere at Red Rock Coffee Co. in Mountain View) and at the end of April with the Women of Song (formerly Ladies of Jazz).

And honestly, just playing a few songs for my fellow retreaters last week was a delightful treat. One woman could not stop raving about my voice and performance, and even recommended me to a house concert venue near where she lives. I don’t know if it will evolve into a gig, but that kind of a response to what I do always feels great.

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So.

Each of these things is part of my Great Why: to create in my various creative expressions, and to make a difference for other people, ideally helping them to follow their own creative bliss.

Despite all the wheel-spinning, over-work and under-rest, it’s good to know that in fact I am still following my Bliss. It seems that rut may just have to do with too much busy-work, which I’m working (no pun intended) on figuring out how to minimize.

How life is like yoga

(Yes, 800 words into this post and I’m finally getting around to the stated theme.)

Even when we’re busily engaged in what we think is following our Bliss, it’s easy to get off track.

In yoga, we need to continually activate and re-activate certain muscles, scanning the body and bringing our attention back and back and back yet again to the various places being worked (or that should be working) in a particular posture. Activate and re-activate the quads, for example, pressing into the floor, pulling up the kneecaps.

A well-lived life is a lot like a body in a challenging asana. We need the reminder to continually focus and re-focus on our evolving Bliss. We need to ask “What is important to me? What do I enjoy most? What am I passionate about?” even after we think we know the answer.

Perhaps especially after we think we know the answer!

Bliss, after all, evolves. Our job is to keep following it.

What about you? When is the last time you checked in on your Great Why? Where are you connecting with it? Where are you out of touch and needing a tune-up?

July 12, 2010

Weekly Review #15: A day late and a dollar short

So how’m I doing in my quest to re-invent my life, follow my evolving Blisses and create the life I really, really want?

All work and no play makes Melissa a dull girl.

Although it’s after midnight on what is now Monday morning, and I’m finally sitting down to write what was supposed to be Saturday’s review because I have been working like a dog to meet deadlines all weekend and have not had a spare second, I have to take a moment to acknowledge that many things are, in fact, going well.

What’s going well

Work

Ahem, yeah. I have lots of it. Wedding season is in full swing, and my bank account is breathing a little easier, even if I am not. Thank GOD for wedding season!

Plus some of the designs I’m working on are coming out really cool. (Pics to come…)

Thriving Artists Project

A great interview with Cosy Sheridan this week reminded me that, oh, yeah, I’m creating this thing. And it’s fun! And though it’s proceeding at what feels like a snail’s pace, it is proceeding.

New subscribers

For some reason a slew (I use that term loosely) of new people have signed up this week, both here and on my music mailing list. Which is awfully validating.

Thanks guys! You know who you are…

Gigs

I’ve got gigs! Three coming up in July and August, plus my biggest fans are going to host a house concert for me.

Which has me all excited about the prospect of more house concerts. (Yes, you too can compete for the label “Melissa’s Biggest Fan” by hosting a house concert. Impress your friends with a real, live music concert in your home. Email me for more info.)

Which has me all excited about working up that solo show I’ve been wanting to put together, like, forever.

And my looping class with Kid Beyond at Jazz Camp West got me all excited about getting a (3-stack) looper to perform with.

Which brings me to…

What’s hard

Work

Um, yeah.

While I heap mountains of praise on the Wedding Season Gods, because at the moment I could not pay my bills without them (and I am bound and determined to pay off my massive pile o’ debt by 2013), this working-all-day-into-the wee-hours-and-not-getting-nearly-enough-sleep-or-R-&-R thing is really getting tired.

And so am I.

Catch-22: when you’re spending the vast majority of your waking hours scrambling to meet deadlines, you can’t put any time and energy into building the new income streams that will ultimately unlock you from the working-too-hard-all-the-time cycle.

HOWEVER, this craziness won’t last forever. Part of why it’s so crazy right now is that I’m going to California Coast Music Camp next week, where I’ll be blissfully disconnected from email, phone and all things work-related. So I’ve got to work overtime for as long as I need to, to make my disappearance possible while still maintaining a functional business.

Which tells you just how important music camp is to me, because the choice to do so is a no-brainer.

Stupid mistakes

Do you know how many times I’ve printed an entire set of invitations before realizing I forgot to hide the cropping box? (InDesign users may understand; if not, sorry, but I’m too tired to explain.)

Suffice it to say, I did it again. An entire ream of paper is now destined for the recycle bin.

Argh.

No money

Gosh darn it I want a looper to make music with! And a video camera to film my hands making art, and my music performances, and to create video classes! But despite the beneficence of the Wedding Season Gods, they’re not being beneficent enough to fund much more than paying off my debt at the moment. (Donations graciously accepted, however. Just sayin’.)

Patience. (Sometimes in short supply around here.)

Kitty pee

Um, yeah. The girl kitty has decided that my life isn’t exciting enough as it is, and is creating pee treasure hunts in my entry hall. Blech, blech, and blechity blech.

You may want to consider buying stock in Anti-Icky-Poo, as I am single-handedly keeping them in business.

(Hmm… I wonder if the girl kitty is getting kick-backs…)

Despite it all…

I managed to get an hour of either yoga or walking in every day. Yay me!

And now, in an attempt to get to bed before sun-up, I’m going to sign off before my word count hits its usual overly-verbose limit.

Happy Monday. Wish me luck with my deadlines this week!

May 23, 2010

New Yoga Art: Irresistible Yogini

Thanks to my life coaching session with Susan on Tuesday, I’ve been making art every day — yay me! Check out my latest creations: the beginning of my Yogini Irresistible Woman line.

Or should that be Irresistible Yogini?

Opinions?

Regardless, watch for them soon on my Zazzle shop as prints, cards, T-shirts, mugs, etc. (Plus a second version of Virabhadrasana II that says “Woman Warrior.”)

Enjoy, and let me know what you think!

May 13, 2010

Headstands, Training Wheels and the Quest for Ever-Elusive Balance

Funny: although I have crazy fear of doing a headstand in the middle of the room, I can float my legs up no problem when I’m near a wall.

It’s psychological, of course, but that wall also serves a useful purpose: just knowing the wall is there to catch me lets me push further into an unknown space — the space of total balance.

The thing is, unless you’re perfectly vertical, headstand is a lot of work. Your arms really need to press into the floor to keep the full weight of your body up in the air. It’s tiring!

When you’re in balance, though, it feels effortless. Free. Like you’re floating. You could stay in headstand this way forever.

Training wheels

Remember learning to ride a bike with training wheels? My training wheels were always slightly off-kilter, so my bike (purple, from Sears, with streamers coming out of the handlebars) leaned either a bit to the left, or a bit to the right. Very uncomfortable. But oh, the stomach-churning panic when I first tried to ride the damned thing after the training wheels came off!

Getting to balance is scary.

Learning where perfect balance is — how far to launch your legs up without toppling over onto your back; how to make those two wheels go fast enough to keep the bike vertical and the skin on your knees intact — takes practice. It’s a learning curve, which for some people is easy and natural, but for others (like me with headstand), not so much.

Those of us in that second group might fall a bunch of times before we hit that sweet spot.

Which is where training wheels can help. For headstand, that might be a wall, or someone to spot you, or hell, just a big ol’ pile of pillows.

Some yoga teachers insist that headstand learners should start out in the middle of the room, the very first time they try, so that they never get psychologically dependent on the wall (like me!) There’s merit to that philosophy.

I, however, tend to be a gentler soul. If using some kind of “crutch” or “training wheels” helps you find that balance point and feel it in your body without hurting yourself in the process, I say more power to you!

This is not just about headstands and bicycles, of course

You may have figured out, 250-some odd words into this post, that the principles here don’t just apply to yoga, or riding a two-wheeler. Whatever your big goal is, when you’re in total balance, everything feels easy. Everything flows.

It’s getting to the balance that’s the challenge.

Where are you still looking for that balance point? Is there something big you want to accomplish, but fear of toppling over is holding you back?

Or are you struggling with something, working really hard at it and feeling like you’re not getting anywhere?

If so, maybe some training wheels are in order. Along with permission to use them. (That part’s key.)

Balance is the ever-elusive goal in every area of my life. Ever-elusive because the only constant is change, and since I’m always changing, what constitutes balance for me is always changing.

Right now the big area I’m focusing on is balance in my work and money spaces. I’ve been making huge changes, and since I’m tired of crashing my proverbial bike and scraping my proverbial knees, I’m making no qualms about the fact that I’m attaching some training wheels to get me going!

Here are some of my training wheels these days:

• Chris Guillebeau’s The Empire Building Kit and other Unconventional Guides

• Chris Guillebeau and Pam Slim’s $100 Business Forum (also an Unconventional Guides product)

• Johnny B. Truant and Lee Stranahan’s Question the Rules

• Dave Navarro’s The Launch Coach Library and workshops

• Naomi Dunford’s Marketing School

They’re making the transition from three-wheeler (my existing business life) to two-wheeler (my ideal vision of my business life) a lot more stable.

Specifics?

I’ve already written a preliminary review of the Empire Building Kit (preliminary only because the EBK is a year-long kit, and I’ve only been doing it about a month), and as I dig further into the other wheels of training, I’ll give you my honest opinion. (Or opinions, plural, because I’m not always of one mind.)

…And back to headstand

Because I feel a lack of closure if I don’t come full circle.

Cool thing: I have now experienced perfect balance in headstand a few times.

Near a wall, of course. (Which I have no plans to abandon anytime soon.)

You may be the Torpedoes-Be-Damned, Learn To Do Headstand In The Middle Of The Room type, but I, for one, am grateful for training wheels!

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And yes, in case you’re wondering, those links in the bullet list are affiliate links. [With the exception of Naomi’s Marketing School, because I couldn’t find an IttyBiz affiliate program. Anyone?]

That means if you click through and end up buying something, I’ll make some money, and you’ll be helping to support me in my quest to create a sustainable life doing what I love. How cool is that?

Just one of the many tools I’m learning from my Business Training Wheels.

I’ll provide a more detailed review of each of these products later, but suffice it to say that I think they are all good products. I only sign up as an affiliate for products I can honestly recommend without feeling all queasy and gross about it. Just sayin’.

Will they be the right products for you? That I can’t say. But I will share a lot more details about each of them in the weeks to come, so watch this space.

May 5, 2010

Fear, trust and baby steps (the perfect headstand not required)

Last Tuesday Giselle made me promise to come to her Jivamukti yoga class this week. With the new month comes a new focus-of-the-month (love that about Jivamukti!) and she knew this month’s focus would be good for me.

She didn’t spill the beans about what the focus would be, but it wasn’t a big surprise when I sat in virasana today (propped on block and blanket, since my knees really don’t like this posture), eyes closed, and listened to her opening talk.

Which was all about fear.

Ah, yes, now I understand why she wanted me to be there.

Fear of falling (and busting my sorry ass)

Last week I confessed after class to my great fear of inversions in the middle of the room, away from the safety of the wall. I burst into tears when I almost fell out of a headstand last week.

Guess what we’ll be focusing on this month? That’s right: inversions. Forearm balance, handstand, headstand. Any posture that brings up fear.

Giselle demonstrated how easy it is to fall out of a forearm balance and land on your feet. How easy it is to fall and not get hurt.

And still, I played chicken.

Oh, I kicked my legs up, I did the “assignments,” but even though I know I can do forearm balance and handstand against a wall, even though I’ve actually achieved balance for moments at a time without touching the wall (just moments, but still!), I couldn’t quite get myself to kick up hard enough to shoot for that same balance in the middle of the room.

I knew I was chickening out, and I still chickened out.

So what’s going on here?

Lack of trust

Well, there’s the excuse that I’ve got an old shoulder injury that’s acting up (which is true), and I don’t want to aggravate it (also true). But that’s just an excuse.

The reality is that yes, I’m afraid. I’m afraid I’ll really hurt myself.

Because underneath it all, I don’t quite trust myself.

I don’t trust that I’ll get all the way up and not fall backwards, and (even more important) I don’t trust that I’ll be able to pull off that falling-out-in-a-safe-way trick.

Taking myself where I am

I could have beat myself up about my chicken-ness, but instead I chose just to notice what was going on inside and let it be.

I know that the way to conquer my fear of inversions is to do them. I know that the way to learn to trust myself that I’ll be able to fall out in a safe way is to try falling out. I know this.

And I also know that right now, I’m not quite ready.

And you know what? That’s actually okay.

So I’ll coddle myself for awhile. And maybe I’ll ask Giselle to spot me, or maybe I’ll “cheat” and keep using the wall until I build up a bit more confidence. And maybe by the end of this month I’ll make some progress.

Or maybe not. Maybe I’ll do inversions against the wall for the rest of my life. (And would that be such a bad thing?)

The truth is, although I think being able to do handstands and forearm balance in the middle of the room would be smokin’ cool, it honestly doesn’t matter to me whether I achieve that or not.

What I do care about, though, is growth, and busting past limits. Although I’d love to be Smokin’ Cool Yoga Girl, yoga is just a petri dish for change in my larger world.

I want to push past my limits in yoga, because I have a very strong suspicion that it will help me push past my limits in the rest of my life.

My commitment: baby steps

So my goal is not to achieve a perfectly balanced handstand or forearm balance away from the wall this month. I don’t actually care about that.

But I do care about making progress. I do care about moving forward and learning to trust myself. I do care about proving to myself that I can do things that feel hard. So my goal is to try to go just a bit further than I’ve gone in the past.

Maybe that means kicking all the way up into a handstand in the middle of the room, just so I can try falling out of it. Or maybe that means doing a handstand at the wall (even if Giselle chastises me). Just one tiny bit beyond my current comfort zone is all it takes to make forward progress.

Baby steps.

Weekly Review #49: How A Well-Lived Life is Like a Yoga Posture

Getting back to my Great Why